Baby Be Mine
by Silent-Fangirl
Summary: Prussia is finally reborn only problem is that it's 2015 and he was found in America by a teenager as a baby. A girl finds the nation and with the help she takes care of the child while trying to also graduate high school and more. However being a young mother is never easy for anyone. The path to her dreams become more blurred as years past. She must decide love or future.
1. Unusual but not impossible

Chapter 1 - Unusual but not impossible

I walked out of the bedroom, shutting the door quietly. I sighed quietly as I dragged my body down the door. I propped my head on my knees, finally having time to relax. How did my life become so hectic, I'm was only seventeen when I had a child.

We'll sorta...

It's not mine, I found him, and he's not really a child, he's a nation, I think, that nation isn't around any more. I didn't even know that when I first found him, and why I didn't I immediately take him to the police is beyond me.

The good thing was that I wasn't doing this alone, I had a friend who agreed to help my care for the child. However two teens raising a baby isn't much better then one teen, no matter how well we convince each other that we're great with kids.

Wait!

Oh jeez, I'm getting ahead of myself.

Okay well I suppose I should start with the day I found him.

I am someone who lived in a middle ground of city and the country. So I wasn't surrounded by nature but I knew where a bunch a small patches of woods were. Every once in a while me and some friends would go out and explored them. However today I went alone, and looking back I'm glad I did cause what I found that day changed my life. It was a rather small patch so I didn't plan on staying to long, I was more than ready to leave, when a sudden noise caught my attention. With it being such a small patch of land the only animals could be there were stray dogs and cats. However that sound was nothing like that, and yet I've heard it before, lots of times. Everytime the sound repeated it filled me with fear and frustration. I knew that sound was familiar, I grew up hearing that sound daily. I turned my back ready to run out, but every time that sound repeated it slowed me down. I was terrified of what the echoing noise was but the frustration of not know what that familiar noise was killed me. Ignoring every irrational thought in my body I ran to the noise. I stopped whenever the noise continued out of fear, and so I could hear where it was coming from. I slowed my step as the noise sounded as if it was right in front of me.

But, where?

Stopping completely I scanned the area. I sound became silent, as it stopped repeating. I shrugged it off, as I started to walk forward a shrieking screaming scared me causing me too stumble back.

I stopped to catch myself from the sudden scare. I then knew clear as day what the sound was, and why it bothered my so.

It was a baby screaming and crying.

How did I not think of it before. I grew up with lots of babies, and babysat a lot. How did I not recognize the sound before?

What help solidify my conclusion was fact that I was currently staring down at an baby laying on the forest floor crying it's heart out.

I immediately panicked, always having a liking for kids I wanted to pick it up, yet hesitated to do so. I only slowly kneeled down near the child, wanting to calm it down. The baby immediately noticed me next to him, and slowly calmed down. I was in awe as the baby's crying came to an end and it stayed calm and quiet just staring at me. I have never seen that before, sure it's possible to calm a child down quickly but without doing anything, impossible. Yet here I am doing the impossible, well I think I did the impossible.

"Hey," I said in a soft tone, I was terrified of setting the baby off, if he could calm down that easy then maybe he could get upset that easy. The baby only smiled, which made me smile back cause to me one of the cutest things ever is a baby smiling. I smiled back as I slowly reached my hand out. The baby quickly reached forward grabbing two of my fingers. I couldn't help but laugh, this was getting cuter by the second.

Without and hesitation this time I bundled the baby in my arms. The child had no problem with it he just continued to laugh and smile.

The cuteness quickly washed away as reality struck me as if somebody had just smack me upside my head.

"I have to take you to the police," I mumbled. The baby quickly quiet down giving me a panicked expression, gripping my fingers tightly.

"I-I" I stammered jumbling over my words, "maybe I shouldn't." I finally said. 'Wait no!' I thought. 'Wait, maybe I shouldn't.'

Why did I even need to rethink this? This is a child that was abandoned in the woods. I sighed as I settled down on my knees still looking at the baby, who looked right back.

"You're not a normal baby," I concluded then pulled out my cellphone.

A/N:

Thank you for reading, this was my friends idea (Childishsince1997) and we are both writing our own sides to it. Even though it was her idea she let me take control of it with story and plot.

Thank you so much for reading again, please do leave reviews and comments so I can get some feedback and improve.

Until next time!

~Silent Fangirl


	2. A Helping Hand

Chapter 2 - A helping hand

A couple things I was lucky enough to have happen to help my plan.

One: the spot I found him was close to a store.

Two: I had a friend who could drive, and was willing to drop everything to come help me.

Three: Teens with children were nothing out of the average where I live.

Things that I was unlucky enough to have:

1: social anxiety while walking around a store with a naked sleeping baby wrapped in my coat.

Doesn't matter if teen mothers were normal here, every time someone glance at me it felt like somebody poking me with hot, burning metal.

Needless to say, since I was waiting at a store for a friend I decided to go through the store to buy some things for the child. After I was done I knew I couldn't walk around in there anymore without raising suspicion, so I waited outside.

Bad thing was that it was autumn and the baby was still only wearing my jacket. Out of fear of the baby getting too cold I took off the first lay of my shirt wrapping him that then my coat. Leaving my in just jeans and a tang top, but that was alright.

What wasn't alright was the amount of stares I got was people walked by. Wondering about improperly dressed girl holding a baby tight to her chest. I even had people ask about me, I only said that I was waiting for a friend, which was true.

Finally she arrived, I immediately stood up and rushed into the car.

My friend stayed silent as she gawked at me.

"It's a long story," I sighed, "can we just go to your house."

My friend hesitated, but eventually left the store as we headed to her house, me explaining the whole way.

Once we were at her house my friend, Jazmin, had heard my whole story. Which wasn't that long now that I think about it. Anyway, when we got there Jazmin slowly turned the car off.

"Rachel," she mumbled my name.

"Yeah," I replied.

"Why didn't you go to the police?" She suddenly shouted.

"Bitch!" I sneered, "shut the fuck up or you'll wake him up."

"Answer me," she demanded in a softer tone.

"I don't know," I mumbled, "I was but then I began to rethink it. Jazmin the police around here are awful. What if they try to put him in an orphanage, those places are always awful!"

Jazmin took a long sigh rubbed her eyes and face, "that's just in story and shows, my god Rachel be realistic."

"I am," I argued.

I knew Jazmin was going to argue back but the baby spoke up first, struggling and whining. Jazmin sighed, "come on let's go inside, nobody's home right now."

Once we inside we decided best if we bathed the child first finally putting clothes on him, even though I completely guessed on clothes when I bought them, they were only a little big.

After he was changed, we lied a blanket down and placed him on it. Assuming that he was too young to roll around we then put the tv on and went into the kitchen to make something for him and us to eat.

"Rachel, what do you expect to do with him?" Jazmin asked. "I know you can't keep him at your house with all of your family." I said nothing just kept my head down. "Rachel," Jazmin said trying to get my attention, "are you trying to keep him?"

My head shot up, "don't be ridiculous, he's not a pet." I exclaimed, "why would I want to,you know that I don't want a family for a long time."

"Rachel?" Jazmin questioned my statement. "If you don't plan to take him to the authorities, then what do you plan to do?"

Blood rushed to my face, "I-I, well I don't know," I paused for a couple seconds to think, "maybe I do want to keep him."

"Still, what are you going to do, you can't keep him at you house," Jazmin stated. Jazmin was taken aback from my big smile, but immediately caught on to it. "Rachel, no!" She turned down.

"Jazmin please it's just until we graduate, then I'll take him," I begged.

"What am I supposed to tell my mom and aunt?" Jazmin asked.

"I don't know, just please, I know he can't stay at my house," I argued.

"What if I call Cassidy and see if maybe-" Jazmin proposed.

"No!" I interrupted. "I want somebody that I know well, and a place I can see him daily. Please Jazmin, I'll help whenever I can, I'll buy all the things he needs, please."

Jazmin groaned softly, "okay, I'll see what I can do, but I'm not making any promises."

"Good enough!" I cheered.

However my victory was short lived as from the other room, we heard loud screams scaring us both.

A/N:

I really don't have much to say except the usual. Anyway thank you for reading, and please do comment and review it will help improve.

Until Next Time!

~Silent Fangirl


	3. The Inevitable

Chapter three - The Inevitable

It wasn't screams of a child, but screams of the birds that Jazmin's aunt kept in the living room. We both rushed into the room to see the birds freaking out.

We were astonished with what we were looking at, the child managed to get to the cages somehow, and also managed to use the cages to stand up, shaking the cages wildly.

"Hey, no!" I shouted running up and grabbing the baby pulling him from the cage. However that caused the cage to fall forward, but before I could react Jazmin caught the cage. I turned my head to see Jazmin's irritated expression. All I could do was chuckle softly to break the tension.

Long story short Jazmin did agree to my plan. What it was that my plan was, Jazmin will keep the child at her house, and I will stop by everyday to help out while providing as much supplies as I can. This will go on until I graduate high school.

The only problem is that this child has massively gotten in the way of my future plans. I realize this rather late months after we kept him, with me wanting to keep him I wouldn't have enough money and time to go to college after high school, and online wasn't something I wanted to do.

The worst thing I had to swallow was the fact that if I wanted to peruse my dream career I would have to give him up. Which became harder every time I saw him, it became more difficult to think of leaving him. However I refused to give up on the goals I've set for myself long ago.

I didn't plan on finding him, however it was my choice to keep him.

I had no idea what I was going to do, which wasn't good cause graduation was around the corner.

The closer the event got the more busy both me and Jazmin became, we were extremely pushing it between graduation and caring for the child.

"Rachel we have to," Jazmin argued.

"No no no no no," I shot down, "did I mention no?"

"Rachel come on, she already graduated, she would have time to watch him," Jazmin pointed out.

"I don't like the idea of somebody I barley know caring for him," I whined holding the baby closer to me.

"I know her, and I trust her," Jazmin added but I still refused, "listen if you trust her with this I will take full blame if anything happens to him." I loudly sighed, it was inevitable.

About an hour later there was a knock on the door, Jazmin opened it to reveal her girlfriend, Cassidy.

"Jazmin, is everything okay?" Cassidy asked.

"Yes, sorta, well we have a problem. Please, come inside." She did as Jazmin said as she walked closer to the place where I was holding the baby.

"Oh, he looks adorable! What's his name?"

"Um...Gilbert," We both said at the same time looking at each other. She looked confused for a second then turned to a different topic.

"Rachel, you have a child?" Cassidy exclaimed.

"OF COURSE NOT!" My face turned red with embarrassment as I started getting defensive. "God damnit, Jazmin!" I scolded "I thought you told her everything!"

"I did! Cass, it's not hers. She found him in the forest." Jazmin quickly explained.

"And you didn't take him to the police?"

"God damnit!" I started to shout which made the baby fuss. Jazmin took him away when I started yelling some more. I don't remember anything I said but when I was done they both looked scared and Gilbert's ears were covered.

"Are ya done?" Jazmin asked.

"I think so..." I huffed, brushing my hair back with my hands.

"Good. Now Cass, I'm glad that you can babysit for us. You will watch him while Rachel and I are at school and one of use will come over to pick him up sometime after school." Jazmin explained, then turned back to me, "did I miss anything?"

"No," I responded then walked up to Jazmin and Cassidy, "but today is Sunday so as of right now, he's mine." I said as a snatched Gilbert away from Jazmin and walked out of the room.

Cassidy turned to Jazmin with a irritated expression. Jazmin shrugged, "she's very attached to him you'll have to excuse her."

A/N: Thanks to my co writer (Childishsince1997) I managed to get another chapter done huzzah! Well as always thank you for reading, please do comment and review so I can improve.

Until Next Time!

~Silent Fangirl


	4. The Babysitter

Chapter 4 - The Babysitter

Have I ever mention that Gilbert is a handful?

No?

Well he is, and apparently Jazmin and I forgot to mention that to Cassidy, but she's good with kids so I shouldn't have to worry. Right?

Right?

Well, Cassidy found out real quick how much of a handful he really is. It all started as soon as we left Cassidy's house the next morning . Gilbert immediately started to struggle in her arms. She slowly put him down smiling at him.

"Well, what would you like to do?" He quickly turned to the television. She nodded picking him up and taking him to the couch. She held him as they sat on the couch and turned the TV on, quickly changing through the channels. He made her stop at a old Tom and Jerry cartoon. He laughed happily as he watched the two violent animals.

Cassidy looked concerned at how interested he was, but figured that it could do him no harm. Soon, the episode was over, and the child's stomach growled loud enough for both of them to hear.

"So, you must be hungry, don't worry I'll make you something. How about oatmeal for breakfast?" He shook his head, Cassidy then picked up the child carrying him to the kitchen, placing him into the high chair. Of course, being a rambunctious child, he immediately started to shake the chair wildly. Cassidy turned slamming her hand on the chair making him stop. Cassidy turned away, Gilbert waited quietly then began to quietly shift out of his seat until he was standing in the chair. He stopped and waited but Cassidy didn't turn around.

He looked up at the huge cabinet full of food and spotted something he loved; sweets. Gilbert slowly and quietly made his way onto the counter, his eyes set on the sweets he stumbled to them. He managed to graze his hands on the box a couple times until the box began to tip. Gilbert moved away as the box fell to the ground with a loud smack.

Cassidy immediately turned around "oh, Gilbert!" She said in a slightly loud tone. He turned to face her with a bored expression. She bent down to pick up the box, before putting him in the high chair locking him in this time.

"Now be good, I'm almost done." She said tapping his nose. He looked upset and tried wiggling out however could not succeed. He then began to rock the chair violently back and forth. Cassidy turned around just as the chair began to tip forward. Cassidy gasped she quickly caught the chair with one hand and accidentally knocked the bowl of food off the counter with the other.

Cassidy sighed as she slowly pushed the chair back. She gradually stepped back, Cassidy then began to clean up the mess, every once in a while, looking back at the baby, who just smile back at her every time.

After she cleaned the mess, she finished the food, which consisted of oatmeal and a warm bottle of milk. She set it on the table next to him and sat down.

"Now, be good for me, okay? So that we can play afterwards." She said as she fed a spoonful to him. Gilbert turned his head whining.

"Oh, you're even pickier then Jazmin, come on, ahh?" Yet he still refused. "Here comes the plane. Open up~" he shook his head then slammed his hands on the table saying no.

"Please Gilbert, open up. How did they get you to eat?" He looked at the cabinet full of food the junk food."Oh no, not this again. I know for sure they don't give you junk food."

"Okay, now let's lay down for a nap, then when you get up, we can have some fun," Cassidy said as she laid the baby in a crib. However the moment Gilbert was in the crib he started to cry and scream.

"Gilbert, come on," Cassidy hushed. "Do this one thing for me." Yet Gilbert wouldn't listen continuing his tantrum. Cassidy sighed this was going to be a long day.

Two hours later there was a knock on the door, Cassidy opened it to see Jazmin and I standing at the door.

Jazmin immediately notice Cassidy's tired and messy look, "you look nice," Jazmin joked, Cassidy didn't even reply, obviously in a bad mood. Cassidy only moved aside to let Jazmin and I walked in.

I walked to the living room to see Gilbert sitting on the floor watching TV. Once he heard me walk in he turned around and started laugh reaching his hands out, I immediately swoop him into my arms.

"I don't know how you guys do it, he refused to listen to me at all," Cassidy commented as she and Jazmin walked in. I looked down at Gilbert who smiled back, I only shrugged as a response.

"Well you won't have to deal with him much longer cause I have great news," I exclaimed smiling big.

A/N:

Thank you all for reading, as always any comments and review are appreciated.

Until Next Time!

~Silent Fangirl


	5. The More Things Change

Chapter 5 - The more things change

I always told myself that I wouldn't get an official job until I graduated. Up until then I always earned money by babysitting or working with family. However now I had no choice, so I got a real job. Why? Well, daycare mainly, and also any other expenses for me and Gilbert. To make it better I now had my license, granted I didn't have my own car yet, but one thing at a time.

The only bad thing was that Cassidy still had to babysit him for the rest of the week and Gilbert still refused to listen to anybody but Jazmin and I.

The three of us spent the rest of the week everyday after school trying to help him. Even though it was slow we made progress. Everyday it would be easier for Cassidy to get Gilbert to listen, even if there was still a lot of struggle. Finally it was next Monday as I dropped Gilbert off at daycare, and to make it easier it was the same daycare that was in my high school. Yet, I couldn't help but flinch as everybody stared at me as I walked into school with a baby.

I stared at the list, I pondered for hours but I still couldn't think of what to do for Gilbert's first birthday. I sat there in the library during my lunch break think of what to do. What do you do for the first birthday of a child you're hiding from your friends and family. I didn't even know what to get him, I lifted my glasses up as I rubbed my eyes.

What was I going to do?

I jumped at the sound of the bell ringing, I quickly packed up my stuff, I needed to get to my next hour.

Surprisingly as the week went by I slowly managed to put together what I could. I saved up what I could from work to get him gifts, as for a cake I decided to do what my mother always did for us when we turned one. When we turned one, my mother would alway get us a small cake and let us get messy with it. I knew that was perfect, Gilbert loved to get messy. We decided to have a little celebration at Jazmin's house with Cassidy.

We held it on Friday, that day after school, I quickly picked Gilbert up and as I headed to the store to get what I needed, while Jazmin and Cassidy got the house ready.

Gilbert sat in the cart playing with my car keys as I got the cake from the bakery. Gilbert's attention quickly changed as I set the small box in the cart.

"No," I said a I lifted him hand away from the box, "it's a surprise." It was so weird, it's as if he knew what we were doing.

It wasn't really his birthday since I didn't know it, so Jazmin thought of something just as good. Half a year from the day I found him, now originally she did recommend the day I found him, but that's so cliché.

I looked back at Gilbert as we left the store, he was in such a happy mood, which put me in a happy mood. Sometimes I believe that he's older than I think it's as if the knows so much for the infant he is. However since I had no idea what age he was I had to wing it.

The moment I pulled up to Jazmin's house she ran out, she rushed up to the driver's door as I got out. "Is everything ready?" I asked. Jazmin nodded, I looked back to see Cassidy already getting Gilbert out of the car, she doesn't waste any time.

"Did you get the cake," Jazmin asked.

"Yup, and I know he's going to love it," I nodded. He had to love it after all it did have a big yellow bird made of frosting on it.

Jazmin and I were too busy talking we didn't notice Cassidy and Gilbert already in the house, that is until we heard a loud noise. We walked into the house to see Cassidy and Gilbert on the living room floor. Cassidy looking like she was just scared, and Gilbert laughing wildly. The same noise repeated as we then realized what happen. Gilbert was popping balloons, and the three of us jumped at the sudden noise.

"Okay that's enough," I said as I took the balloon away, Gilbert immediately started to throw a tantrum. I passed the balloon to Jazmin then picked Gilbert up. "Come on now, if you start this we can't celebrate," I told him. Gilbert quite down as he rubbed his eyes, "huh, are you tired?" I asked. I bit my lip as I thought back to when we were at the store, he was yawning a lot, and I'm pretty sure he fell asleep in the car. "Okay let's put you down for a nap, we can celebrate later."

Cassidy and Jazmin sat waiting in the kitchen. I finally walked in sitting down at the table with them. "Sorry guys," I apologized, "I didn't think that he would skip his nap today."

"That's alright, it gives me some time to relax," Jazmin pointed out.

"He listens to you real well," Cassidy commented.

"Yeah but he's still a troublesome child," I said.

"Rachel" Jazmin asked, "are you doing online school after high school?"

"No, you know I don't want to do college online," I replied.

"Then how will you get the time and money to go to college, work and look after Gilbert?" Jazmin asked. I said nothing as I thought this over, I remained silent as I got up from my seat leaving the room. "What are you doing?" Jazmin asked, but I had no response. Once I was out of the room Cassidy looked over at Jazmin confused. "Stubborn girl," Jazmin mumbled.

It was hours after the celebration, as I wash Gilbert up, both me and Cassidy decided to stay the night at Jazmin's. Gilbert continued to make weird sounds as I washed his face. I smiled as I finished, my smile slowly deteriorated as I thought about the talk we had.

What was I going to do?

I shook the thought away as a wrapped Gilbert in a towel. I laid him on the floor as I began to dry him. I stopped as I dried him off, I realized something, his hair was pure white.

"You're albino," I mumbled, Gilbert only smiled in response. "This day is just full of what the fuck moments." Gilbert then touched my hand, catching my attention. The what the fuck moments continued as I gasped.

"Mommy," Gilbert repeated.

A/N:

I was given a request to have a chapter with Gilbert's POV, sure but it will have to wait. But now that we're on the topic of requests, I will always be open for requests, so go right ahead.

Anyway thanks for reading, as always comments are always appreciated!

Until Next Time!

~Silent Fangirl


	6. The Key to Responsiblity

Chapter 6 - The Key to Responsibility

It had been a few weeks after Gilbert's birthday and things have been going pretty normal except of his talking. Ever since his first word he couldn't stop babbling. His words, however were mostly from me so they were not words a kid shouldn't hear.

Forgetting that for a moment there were a few things exciting happening for me.

One, I was graduating in two weeks.

Two, I finish school in a couple of days.

Three,-

I turned at the sound of a crash, I ran into the living room to see a small shelf on the ground. I looked over to notice Gilbert next it laughing hysterically. I sighed as I walked over picking up the shelf and what has fallen off it.

Three, Gilbert can now walk.

However that didn't matter cause I had more to worry about.

Four, I had a college visit today.

I still wanted to actually go to college, and with the grant I have I will be able to go without worrying about the cost. However I decided to give Cassidy and Jazmin a break and take him with me, seeing how he listens to me the best out of the three.

"Okay Gilbert," I said, picking him up. "We gotta get going."

"Hey," Jazmin called before I could go through the front door. "Are you still taking Gilbert with you?" She asked.

"Yeah," I replied, "so what?"

"You're crazy, he's just going to misbehave, leave him with me, I don't care," Jazmin offered.

"No, it's alright," I argued, "besides he needs to learn how to behave in public."

"You're crazy~" Jazmin shouted as I walked out the door.

Jazmin's the one that's crazy, Gilbert is doing just fine, then again we had just got here. I looked down at Gilbert, sitting on the floor playing with my keys. I have no idea what his interest was with them, I bought him all this new stuff and he ignores them all for my keys.

"Rachel," a lady called. I immediately looked up, the woman turned her head telling me that she was ready. I picked Gilbert up, the lady immediately noticed him. Almost a year with him and I still can't get past the looks.

The tour started instantly, after a while Gilbert began to squirm wildly. I quickly stopped placing him on the floor, Gilbert grabbed my coat walking with me. The pressure on my coat always told me that he was next to me, yet I couldn't help but look back. Every time I did he would look up and smile at me, I would smile back and turn back to the tour.

Yeah Gilbert was just fine, I wish I could say that for the whole tour. It wasn't until we started to go into the classrooms. I guess he got bored, or maybe it was because I got so distracted. Either way he cut himself loose before we left the first classroom. I was so in awe of the scale and size of the room I didn't look back.

So yeah, it was completely my fault. Gilbert was only one, sure he could walk but he had the shortest attention span ever. As much as I would love to say that he's just troublesome, I can't because I am the one to look after him.

"Okay, well, you are free to look on as you please, just don't disturb the students," the lady said as we left the room.

"Okay Gil-" I stopped when I realized that my one year old was no longer next to me. I panicked quickly looking around for him; he was nowhere to be found. I stopped when I heard a faint noise, a soft familiar noise; my keys, Gilbert had them. I ran down the halls trying to follow the noise, stopping every once in a while to wait and listen. After minutes of playing that game, I finally stopped but heard nothing. I bit my lip, I wanted to shout his name but I couldn't disturb the students. I slowly walked down the hall in the hopes that I would hear him.

I flinched at a loud ding went off behind me. I turned to see the elevator door open, but nobody walking out or in. I shrugged going into the elevator, maybe Gilbert somehow made it on to a different floor. I pressed the button for second floor, once it was moving I sighed leaning back against the wall. The noise of the keys repeated in my mind, repeating over, and over, and over. It actually became rather annoying, constantly repeating. However it wasn't until I heard laughing along with the keys that I realized it wasn't in my head. It was just as the elevator door opened I looked down to see Gilbert sitting on the elevator floor shaking the keys and laughing.

I gasped quickly swooping him into my arms. "Oh my god, Gilbert," I exclaimed hugging him tightly. I looked up to noticed people looking at me, I gave out a low cough quickly running out.

"I told you," Jazmin mocked, as we sat back at her house.

"Oh, can it!" I sneered, I was in no mood for her 'I was right' speech.

"Mommy," Gilbert whined. I looked over to see Gilbert looking over the couch arm. I leaned over picking him up, the moment he was on my lap he reached for the keys around my neck. "No," I denied, Gilbert stared at me for a second then turned, calmly sitting on my lap. After a while I pulled out my phone to notice the late time, "I need to head home," I commented. Gilbert immediately turned around when I said that. I stood up placing Gilbert on the ground. Both Jazmin and I walked to the front door. Gilbert pulled at my jacket as I stood at the front door. "Goodbye Gilbert," I said kissing him on the forehead. Gilbert watched as I walked to my car, watching until Jazmin had to pulled him out of the doorway just to close the door.

A/N: I am so happy that people like this, thank you! Thank you again for reading. As always any comments or reviews are appreciated.

Until Next Time

~Silent Fangirl


	7. Moving On and Out

Chapter 7 - moving on and out

I moved out!

Well sorta.

I get ahead of myself so often, let me go back.

It had been two weeks since the incident at the college. I ended up getting accepted into that college thankfully, but it was so far away from my home, and with Gilbert, dorms wasn't an answer. Gas money was a pain going there then to my work, then going to pick Gilbert up from daycare, then going to Jazmin's, then back home. So I needed to move out, and closer to the college.

Oh, and Cassidy and Jazmin got a apartment by then too, ten miles away from my college! When I started to talk about my problems, Jazmin got a idea.

"Why not stay at our place? We have room." She proposed.

"Are you sure? It would seem really crowded." I mentioned

"Not at all, we have a bedroom that you can use, and you get more time with Gilbert. You would have to help with the bills and things."

"Of course!" I exclaimed, I planned on giving up buying toys that Gilbert would never use, for a long time.

"Rachel," my little sister whined, "you just graduated."

"Yeah, so," I replied as I went through my belongings, packing up. "I also just got accepted into a college. Besides I've wanted to move out long before I graduated."

Moving out didn't take very long, just as I help them, Jazmin and Cassidy help me move in. However to me it was just temporary, I wanted to move out, just me and Gilbert. I wasted no time looking for a new home, I didn't need anything big, just something to suet just the two of us.

I sat on my bed on my laptop, searching home as Gilbert sat on my lap watching me surf the net. It wasn't until I felt something hit my chest that I looked down to see Gilbert sleeping, laying back on me. I smiled as a shut my laptop, I picked him up taking him to the next room, laying him in his crib.

"I know you're only one," I said to myself, "but I feel like I should get you an older bed."

"Hey!" Jazmin called out from the doorway. I quickly turned around placing my finger on my lips. Jazmin took my signal for her to quiet down right away. She walked in getting closer to me, "hey, I heard you're already looking for a new home."

"Yeah, so?" I mumbled.

"Why," Jazmin asked, "you literally just moved in."

"Yes, and I'm very grateful but I do actually be on my own, well on my own with Gilbert," I explained. Jazmin said nothing she just left the room, leaving a void of awkward silence behind her.

I looked back at Gilbert who was sound asleep, I slowly leaned forward kissing Gilbert on the forehead, then left the room. Before I shut the door completely I stopped looking back, "I have no idea what I'm doing," I admitted then shut the door behind me.

I had a bit of time before I started college, and with the time I have, not at work, I decided to go school shopping and take Gilbert with me.

As we were shopping, Gilbert looked around the aisle, I glance at him every once in a while. He has improved on behaving in public, which was great because the day I go back to college is the day he starts at he new daycare.

"Gilbert," I called, Gilbert immediately turned running up to me grabbing my shirt and walking with me.

"Mommy, mommy, mommy," Gilbert called smacking his hand on my side. I flinched, not because he was hitting me, but because every time he calls me mommy it makes me feel flustered. I look down to see Gilbert reaching, I then noticed that he was reaching for the keys. I rolled my eyes taking them off from around my neck.

Once I handed them to him, he then proceeded to shake them wildly. The noise attracted the attention of other people who looked and mumbled at me. My cheeks burned as I quickly grabbed Gilbert, leaving the aisle.

It's moments like that, that get me thinking?

Thinking about something that I've been procrastinating since I've turned eighteen and graduated.

A/N:

Thank you for reading!

I will be taking a break to work on some other stories, don't know how long. I'm hoping that taking a break will help me think of better chapters.

Anyway as always, any comment or review will be appreciated!

Until Next Time!


	8. Separation Syndrome

Chapter 8 - Separation Syndrome

I couldn't avoid it anymore, this was something that I've been thinking about for a while, now that I'm thinking our future. This was something I had to do if I ever wanted to give Gilbert a future in school.

I officially had to adopt him.

I pulled up to the building my heart practically pounding a hole in my chest. I looked back to see Gilbert staring out the window, I took a deep breath. "Lets just hope that they believe my story," I mumbled.

As I walked up to the building I couldn't help but pull Gilbert closer to my chest. I walked in to have the people at the desk look up and stare at me.

"Can I help you?" The lady at the front desk asked.

"Yes," I said slowly as I looked down at Gilbert in my arms, "you see I found this child recently and would like to adopt him."

"Oh, how recently?" She asked taking notice of the way Gilbert cling to me as I held him.

"Few days ago," I lied.

"Well okay," the lady said as she stood up sticking her hands out, "let me see him."

"Huh, why?" I asked taking a step back.

"Well before you can adopt him we have to give him a background and medical check," She replied.

I tightened my grip, "how long will this take?" I stammered.

"A couple days at the least that is if don't find any medical issues or somethings in his background," she replied.

"What do mean in his background?" I questioned.

"Well we try to find the parents to see if he abandoned or just lost, if lost then we can return him," she responded.

That statement alone felt like somebody took a baseball bat to my chest. I gave out a small quiet choke, my chest felt as if the hit shattered my bones and organs. "An-and if you don't?" I stuttered.

"Well then after some paper work and other processes you can adopt him," The woman stated.

"O-oh," I struggled to grasp my words, "okay."

The woman smile as she stood in front of me with her hands out. "It's okay he will be taken care of just fine, he will be placed in an orphanage until then."

I took a deep breath, there was no way I could back out of this now. I slowly loosed my grip pulling Gilbert away from me. Gilbert took notice of this motion looked up at me with confusion. I tried my best but I just couldn't contain my shaking as I handed Gilbert over.

"Alright I will be right back, I just need you to sign some papers," She said, she then turned around walking away.

Gilbert turned and looked over her shoulder at me, he reached his arms out as if he actually thought he could reach me. I only faked a smile waving goodbye. I could have said what I usually said when I dropped him off at daycare or leave him with Cassidy or Jazmin. I could have said, 'it's okay, I'll be back.' However I couldn't, because there was the horrible chance that I may never see him again.

I finally came home also a hour later. I closed the door so slow that I'm was sure that nobody heard me come home, that is until Jazmin came into the room.

"Hey," Jazmin greeted but quickly caught onto my depressed expression. "What's wrong? Wait where Gilbert?" I didn't respond as I just walked past Jazmin. "Wait where are you going?"

"To my room," I responded.

"To do what? You didn't even answer my question," Jazmin exclaimed.

"To die a little more on the inside," I replied as I shut the bedroom door behind me.

"Wait, what did she that she was doing today?" Jazmin asked herself, after remembering she walked away, assuming it would be best to leave me alone.

Would it be wrong to say that the past three days without Gilbert seemed easier? I mean that can be expected, I guess caring for a child is difficult and I guess after almost two years of caring for him I would notice it. Doesn't mean that those days made me happy, in fact the sudden routine change made me even more depressed. I just couldn't shake the gaping feeling he left for the past few days.

There were a couple thing that noticeably changed in those few days;

One, I was improving in college, due to the fact I wasn't constantly taking care of Gilbert I had more time to work on college.

Two, I had a lot more time to work, again with the more time I have, I decided to pick up more hours.

Three, life seemed easier, sad to say but even with more time working and in college everything seems more relaxed.

It was rather upsetting to think about it, my life was easier without him. However all the free time in the world couldn't kick me out of the slump I was experiencing. I practically had to force myself to have motivation, for everything, college, work, home chores. The time I spent looking at homes was little to no time, I just seemed to stop caring.

It's been a whole week, I had sometime between college and work so I decided to take a nap. Not that I was trying to catch up on some sleep, again with the free time I had not working or at college I didn't really do much just slept because I didn't have the motivation to do anything else. Anyway, I was asleep when my cellphone went off. I groaned as I lifted my head up, I squinted looking at the shining light from my phone.

"Yeah...hello?" I mumbled as I answered. The conversation went on with all of my responses consisting of "yeah," and "uh huh." Once the conversation was over I closed the phone I sat up in my bed thinking over the conversation I just had. It wasn't until the person whom I had the conversation with clicked in my mind.

I gasped, quickly jumping out of my bed, however I was half asleep so I did stumble, falling on the floor. Jazmin turned as I ran into the living room, clutching at the doorway so I would stumble again.

"What's going on?" Jazmin asked.

"It's the adoption center," I said through my breaths, "they want me to come over."

"What why?" Jazmin questioned.

"I don't know," I exclaimed as I rushed to get out the door.

"Wait you don't even know what you're-" Jazmin began but was cutoff when I ran out the door, "going there for." Jazmin mumbled.

A/N:

Something worth noting that I rarely do reach on some of the things I write. I probaly should start researching some of the stuff I write huh?

Anyway, as always thanks for reading? Also any comments and reviews are highly appreciated, I always enjoy feedback.

Until Next Time!

~Silent Fangirl


	9. Language Barrier

Chapter 9 - Language Barrier

"She hasn't let him out of her sight since she got back," Jazmin commented to Cassidy as the two watch me go around the house, Gilbert at my tail the whole time.

"You talk about her, but you have to realize that he's been her shadow all day," Cassidy replied.

"I mean you and I missed him too, but his full attention is on her," Jazmin grumbled.

"You have to realize, to him she's the mom and we're the strange aunts," Cassidy pointed out.

"You're the strange aunt," Jazmin joked, "I'm the awesome aunt."

"You wish!" Cassidy scoffed.

"Hey!" I shouted from the other room, "quit flirting, dinner is done!"

"Rachel you're in such a better mood now," Cassidy pointed out as her and Jazmin sat down at the table, "I mean you spent all day running around and doing chores, and school stuff, it use to be so difficult to even get you out of bed."

I shrugged, "I'm just in a better mood, but don't worry my ambition won't last very long."

"It really won't," Jazmin agreed.

"What about this one?" I asked Gilbert as the two of us sat on my bed looking through houses, later that day. I could tell he didn't care, but he was just chilling laying back on me.

"Hey loser!" Jazmin exclaimed, as she poked her head into the room, "Cassidy made dessert, so come get some."

"Hell yeah!" I shouted throwing my hands up, Gilbert stayed silent but threw his arms up almost punching me in the face.

"Here you go," Cassidy said as she placed the bowl on the table in front of Gilbert.

"Danke," Gilbert said smiling.

"Excuse me?" I questioned quickly turning around.

"Danke," Gilbert repeated.

"What?" Cassidy asked.

"Danke," Gilbert kept repeating.

"I don't think that's english," Jazmin stated.

"Why wouldn't it be," I exclaimed, "he's two, and none of us speak any other language."

"Well he doesn't talk a lot," Cassidy pointed out.

"He says a few words sometimes," I argued.

"Is it possible that he knows a different language, and is having trouble learning english because of it?" Jazmin asked.

"He's two!" I exclaimed.

Cassidy sighed pulling out her phone and kneeling down to Gilbert, "what was that word you said sweetie?" Cassidy asked holding the phone up to Gilbert.

"Danke," Gilbert replied.

Cassidy stood up staring at her phone as Jazmin and I waited in curiosity. Finally at sound came from her phone. "It's german," Cassidy stated.

"What?" Jazmin and I asked.

"And he said thank you," Cassidy continued.

"He's two!" I exclaimed.

"I don't know, maybe his real parents were german," Jazmin shrugged.

"Oh god, we must have confused him so much," I panicked.

"Okay let's bring this back to reality," Cassidy calmly said, "even if his parents spoke perfect german I think that he wouldn't know it that well for the age that Rachel found him."

"Soooo," I dragged, confused on how to tackle this.

"We should probably work a little more help him learn english, maybe get him in some program if we can't make any progress," Cassidy recommended.

"I don't think so," I disagreed, "we should just tackle this like how a normal child, he'll get it eventually even if it takes him longer."

"Mommy," Gilbert shouted, I looked down to see him at my legs reaching his arms up, I quickly caught on picking him up.

Jazmin and Cassidy exchanged glances between each other for a couple seconds before finally turning to me.

"Okay I guess," Cassidy shrugged.

"Yeah," Jazmin agreed, "it's your call."

A/N:

Sorry that it's rather short however I have started the next chapter already so you guys can look forward to that.

Anyway, all comments, reviews, and questions are appreciated!

Until Next Time!

~Silent Fangirl


	10. All That Glitters

Chapter 10 - All that glitters

It wasn't until that Monday morning that I realize how fast the year has gone by. I was woken up that morning by a light shining on my face. I rubbed my eyes, slowly opening them to see Gilbert standing at the side of my bed.

"Gilbert?" I mumbled. Gilbert ran over to the window banging on it frantically. "Hey, hey, hey, what are you doing?" I demanded. Gilbert then began to pull at the curtains. I quickly pulled the curtains away from him quickly catching a glance of the outside. I immediately looked again, finally seeing what Gilbert wanted me to see.

The outside was covered in snow it must have been snowing all night, I just then realized that it was early December. Gilbert smiled as he pointed at the window looking back and forth from the window to me.

I sat up in my bed wrapping myself in my blanket, I pointed outside. "Snow," I told him.

"Snow," he repeated, I quickly leaned over picking him up and wrapping him in the blanket with me. The sudden noise of my cellphone going off caught my attention, I turned it on the see a notification from the weather. I quickly read through the school closing and happily seen my college appear, I had no school today and I didn't have to work until 5:00.

"Fuck yeah!" I exclaimed.

"Fuck yeah!" Gilbert repeated.

Blood rushed to my cheeks, "don't repeat that in front of Jazmin and Cassidy, okay?" Gilbert nodded in agreement.

"You look so cute!" Cassidy squealed not long later, as she finally finished dressing Gilbert.

"At this rate we'll never leave," I mumbled as I walked into the living room.

"I'm sorry," Cassidy apologized, "it's just so cute."

"Everything about Gilbert is cute to you," Jazmin stated.

"Okay, come on Gilbert lets go," I called kneeling down and holding my hands out, Gilbert turned running into my arms.

Jazmin softly chuckled, "I can't believe that you forgot that it's December."

I stood back up, bouncing Gilbert up to get to better hold. "Yeah, yeah I know, I'm a mess, but it wasn't really December that I forgot it was that fact that Christmas is coming up, and I'm not even close to done with shopping."

"I don't really understand you," Jazmin commented, "you celebrate Christmas, yet you don't believe in religion."

"Fucking hilarious Jazmin," I sneered, "you still think that Christmas is about religion. In this modern time, fucking hilarious."

"Fucking hilarious," Gilbert repeated. Blood rushed to my face as both Cassidy and Jazmin turned to me.

"Rachel," Cassidy exclaimed, "have you been teach Gilbert swear words?"

"No!" I exclaimed, "he just picks me up, I don't want him swearing."

"Well when his mommy has the worst language ever, he's bound to pick something up," Jazmin commented.

I turned glaring at Jazmin, I then used one hand to cover Gilbert's eyes and the other to give Jazmin a certain gesture.

Okay so in hindsight I probably would have gotten a lot more done if I didn't bring a child with me. He seemed to have gotten distracted by everything and due to the fact that it was around Christmas there were light and shiny things everywhere. Even if it was cute to watch him so wide eyed and amazed by everything I think I'll leave him with Jazmin and Cass next time.

I've also come to that point in his life were he's annoying and yet so adorable. The whole ride home he sat there pointing out the window yelling, "mom snow." Again he's adorable but the novelty wore off rather quick.

"I'm back, now somebody take the child!" I shouted as I walked in my arms wrapping around Gilbert. As soon as Cass walk in the room I dropped Gilbert to his feet and he ran to her.

"Long day?" Cass asked.

"Very," I replied.

"Go shopping today I said," I mumbled to myself as sat down on my bed after I got home from work, "it'll be productive I said. I'm full of dumb ideas." Just as I lied down a loud scream came from the backyard. I immediately sat up and looked out the window to see Cassidy in the backyard and Jazmin running outside.

"What's going on?" I asked as I followed outside. Gilbert quickly jumped from Cass' arms running up to me. I kneeled down and gasped when I noticed the blood on his hands. "What the hell!"

"It's rabbit blood," Jazmin explained.

"I still stand by my previous statement; what the hell!" I exclaimed.

"He-" Cassidy stammered, "I walked outside to see him-"

"He killed a rabbit," Jazmin explained bluntly.

I opened my mouth but closed it when only three words came to my mind. "What the hell!"

"Rachel!" Jazmin shouted.

I shook my head to help think of other words to say, "let's go inside. Somebody throw that rabbit away or at least make sure it's far away so it doesn't attract and animals."

Jazmin and Cassidy exchanged glances as I picked up Gilbert and took him back into the house.

"Why did you do that?" I asked as I washed Gilbert's hands, he only shrugged. "Gilbert," I called grabbing his facing and turning to me, "that's isn't good, you can't just going around killing animals you're not some kind of savage." Gilbert remained quiet he then slowly began to reach for my long brown hair, he grabbed a piece holding onto it loosely. His fingers twitched as tears began to run down his face. He didn't make a noise as he pulled his hand back. "Gilbert," I mumbled, "what's wrong?" He didn't say a word as he just leaned forward wrapping his arms around me. "What the hell," I mumbled as I carried him away.

"What happen?" Cass asked as the three of sat in the kitchen late that night.

"I don't really know," I replied, "but now that I think about it. It's not the first time."

"Seriously?" Jazmin and Cass said almost in unison.

"I didn't realize it until after I put him to bed but as he gets older he seems to have these moments more often," I explained.

"Moments?" Jazmin questioned.

"These kinda random moments where he would get depressed and quiet. However it seems like the most random things trigger this," I continued.

"What triggered him this time?" Cass asked.

I paused looking down at the small pieces of hair that fell in front of my shoulders and ran down my chest. I slowly picked up a piece running my fingers through it.

"Rachel!" Jazmin called. My head immediately shot back up to the two girls. "What is it?"'

"I don't know," I lied.

A/N:

Thanks for reading!

Also if you guys would like I've written a couple of original stories over on my Wattpad account (Screaming_Fangirl) if you would like I might even post it on my Fiction Press. So if you would like check it out and support over there I would highly appreciated it.

Anyway all comments and reviews are highly appreciated.

Until next time!

~Silent Fangirl


	11. Passion Blinds the Most Correct Minds

Chapter 11 - Passion blinds the most correct minds

It seemed like as he got older these moment became more frequent, yet more predictable. I knew what to keep out of his way and what could set him off. I've thrown myself into a motion that every time he had one of these moment I would always remember what it was. Yet even though I've made mental note after mental note of what upsets him I still have no idea why. Why? What's going on in his head to set him off, to make him so sad?

But more importantly why does my appearance set him off?

Well to be honest it doesn't always set if off, just when I got upset at him which happens more then I'd like to admit. It's awful, I get upset at him, he gets set off and then I feel horrible. Maybe he's doing it just to get out of trouble, but whenever it is, it works.

That's when I get the feeling; the feeling that I have no idea what I'm doing.

Maybe I don't, but I've spent most of my life taking care of children yet for some reason I always seem to be guessing on what to do with him. He's different I've come to that conclusion, but how he's different I have yet to figure out.

However even with these sporadic moments I've managed to get a couple things together. Christmas was just a couple days away and after Christmas will finally be able to move out into my own house.

Can't say I don't feel bad, I mean Jazmin and Cass have been so nice to take care of Gilbert and letting me move in. Also Jazmin has not been the easiest to talk to about moving out. Hell I think she put up more of a fight then my own mother. Cass was supportive, and helpful when it came to getting Jazmin to calm down, and Gilbert didn't really care or know what to do with it. He seemed mildly upset to be moving away from Jazmin and Cass, but he got over it real fast.

Cass turned slightly as she heard the front door open and close, then turned back to her cooking.

"It's cold as fuck out there," I complained from the other room.

"What happen to not swearing?" Jazmin asked.

"Have you heard how I talk?" I replied, "I can't just completely stop."

"She's not even trying to hold back," Cass mumbled as Jazmin and I walked into the kitchen.

"Where's Gilbert?" I asked. We turned as we heard some shuffling, not long later we saw Gilbert pop his out from under the table. Jazmin and I gave a puzzled look as he crawled out from the table and ran up to me. I quickly picked him up holding him up in my arms. "What were you doing under the table?" I asked.

"Secret fuck! Ah, fort." Gilbert exclaimed. I smiled, he's become so good at engl- WAIT WHAT DID HE SAY! I looked at Gilbert to Jazmin, who was trying to hold back her laughing, then I turned to Cass who was already looking at me with a pissed expression. Even though she only had a wooden spoon in her hand I knew that it would bring just as much pain and misery as if she were holding a knife.

"Old habits die hard," I mumbled as I set Gilbert down, probably not my best idea. Cassidy only sighed as I quickly made my way out of the room.

It's surprising how easy life can seem before it hits you like a train. Things seemed so easy, I was moving, college and work went without a stitch and Gilbert was getting better at almost everything. It was going so well, and the worst part about it is, that it's was going great for so long that when that train hit you might as well had said I'm dead. Well maybe not its more like after the hit I got up and began to slowly walk again hoping that if I did that I can convince myself that the hit never happen.

Needless to say it started out great, especially due to the fact that I already had the house and it wasn't even Christmas yet. I could move in when I wanted but waited, because I promised Cass and Jazmin that I would spend Christmas with them. Hell why not, I wasn't spending it with my family why not spend it with some friends.

"This is it," I said as I unlock the door to the new house. I wasn't leaving for another week, but due to the fact that I was already slowly moving into the house I decided to show Cass and Jazmin.

"It's kinda small," Jazmin commented.

Yeah of course she would find something to complain about. "It's a house for two people it's fine," I argued.

"It's so far away," Jazmin continued.

"It's not that far, just little over half a hour," I mumbled.

"What about college and daycare?" Jazmin asked.

This nitpicking was getting on my nerves, "it's fine, they have a daycare here, and even though college is further then I would like, work is close by that that's better in the long run."

"I guess you're right," Jazmin mumbled.

"You know I'm right," I said as I walked away, and when I say walked I mean I stupidly tried to moonwalk out.

Yeah...

*******

"You like this room?" I asked Gilbert as we walked into an empty room. Out of the two bedrooms in the small house his was smaller so it only made sense to give him that room. Then again it's an empty room so I don't even know how he would answer me. He wasn't excited just curious. He looked around the room, out the window in the closet and since I had already started moving some stuff in, he was looking through the boxes. To only realize that it was his stuff and started to take them out.

"Gil-" I began then stopped, I could always clean it up later.

"Rachel!" Jazmin called from down the hallway.

I poked my head from out of the door, "what?"

"I'm hungry!" Jazmin shouted.

"Do I look like your mother!" I exclaimed.

Jazmin began to shout back but I didn't pay attention due to Gilbert pulling at my jacket. I looked down to see an expression that looked like he was about to cry.

"What's wrong?" I asked kneeling down. He didn't say another word he just leaned forward wrapping his around my neck. I sighed then pulled my arms around him and picked him up. "Let's go get something to eat," I mumbled as we walked out of the room.

********

"Aw he's so cute," a waitress cooed, she was just walking by our table until she noticed Gilbert sitting on my lap. "Is he your son?" She asked.

"Uhh," that was the only thing I said before she gave me a confused expression.

"Sorry," she quickly said before walking away.

"Smooth," Jazmin commented.

"What was that about?" Cass asked.

"I don't know, she just caught me off guard," I explained.

"Why?" Cass asked. "Do you not think of Gilbert as your son?"

"Of course not!" I paused, why did that question bother me. Hell, I went trough the trouble of hiding and adopting him. It can't be the fact that he's adopted, I'm adopted!

Later that night I walked into the living room to see Gilbert still up laying on the couch watching a movie with Jazmin.

"What's going on?" I asked.

"Chillin," Jazmin replied.

"I mean what is he doing up?" I demanded, I know I put him to bed almost an hour ago.

"He just wandered out in here," Jazmin said, "how did you not notice?"

"I was busy doing homework for college," I sneered. Jazmin only shrugged, I gave out a long exhale, I was not in the mood for this. "What are you even watching?" I asked walking further into the living room to see the T.V.

"One of the Saw movies," Jazmin answered.

"What!" I exclaimed. "Gilbert," I called, "come on you're going to bed." Gilbert quickly rolled off the couch and ran up to me taking my hand.

"Boo," Jazmin shouted as we walked away, "boooooooo!"

******  
"Booooo!" I shouted smacking Jazmin behind the head, later that night.

"What the hell!" Jazmin exclaimed holding the back of her head.

"You're an asshole," I explained as I sat down across from her.

"Why, cause I didn't do anything when Gilbert left his room?" Jazmin asked.

"Yes," I replied, "he needs to go to sleep when I say so."

"Why?" Jazmin asked, "he doesn't have to be anywhere tomorrow, it Christmas Eve tomorrow."

"Yeah I know but I don't want him sleeping all day, cause you let him stay up all night," I explained.

"Whatever," Jazmin mumbled. "Speaking of Christmas Eve are you going to your mother's house tomorrow?"

"No," I mumbled.

"Why not? You didn't go last year either," Jazmin asked.

"I can't bring Gilbert and explain to them why I adopted a four year old at the age of nineteen," I explained.

"You could always leave him with Cass and I," Jazmin offered.

"No, I'll be fine," I turned down, "I'll explain it eventually." With that I stood up from the table and began to walk away.

"Rachel!" Jazmin called.

"Good night," I called back waving goodbye without turning around.

Jazmin sighed as I walked out of sight, "she's a special kind of stupid."

A/N:

Okay so to be honest I'm looking to wrap this story up as soon. Not that I don't like this story no I love writing it. No I just think that I can only do so much with this story and I already know how I'm going to end it. Plus I want another finished story under my belt.

Anyway all comments and reviews are appreciated for feedback and support.

Until Next Time!

~Silent Fangirl


	12. Pride and Parenting

Chapter 12 - Pride and Parenting

Christmas had past which meant one thing, the time to move out and that went by quicker then expected. Everything seemed fine until the first night Gilbert spent in the house. I had put him to bed just a hour ago and now I was busy unpacking when I heard the creaking. I quickly turned but nothing was behind or around me.

"Gilbert?" I called, the only respond I got was more creaks. I closed the box and walked out of the room. "Gilbert!" I called once more still more creaks. I walked down the hallway towards Gilbert's bedroom door. I slowly opened his door to see a pitch black room. I sighed as I was about to shut the door the hallway became dark. I gasped turning around, I thought I was going crazy until I felt something pull at my pants. I looked down to see a bright pair of red eyes looking up at me. "Gilbert?" I questioned as I turned on his bedroom light shining light into the hallway, to reveal that it was him. "Jesus fucking christ," I mumbled. I then kneeled down, "what are you doing out of your room?" Gilbert didn't say a word he just wrapped his arms around me. I sighed as I picked him up. "What's wrong? You don't like your new room, I know you can sleep in a room by yourself."

"It's too quiet," he mumbled.

"Too quiet?" I repeated.

Needless to say he slept in my bed as I finished unpacking for my room. Once I finished I made a quick phone call.

"Too quiet?" Jazmin questioned over the phone.

"Yeah it makes no sense, he's such a quiet child, then again all day he's been talking a lot more like he's trying to make as much noise as possible," I stated.

"Huh, what?" Jazmin mumbled.

"What?" I asked.

"Oh sorry Cass was saying something," Jazmin replied. "She thinks that he doesn't like the quiet."

"What?" I exclaimed.

"Rachel, he's lived in a house with three other people, he's use to the noise, and I'm sure that even when he's going to sleep he would listen to the noise we made no matter how quiet we were," Cass explained taking the phone from Jazmin.

I paused remaining quiet thinking as I listened to the noise of Jazmin trying to get her phone back. Eventually I was so deep into thought that I didn't even completely process my actions when I hung up my cellphone and set it down on the table. I had dealt with kids all my life but the idea of a child not liking the quiet made sense yet still rattled me. Eventually I gave up trying to think it through and went back upstairs to my bedroom.

I woke up the next morning to a cold hand smacking my face repeatedly. I placed a hand in front of my face catching the icey hand. I opened my eyes to see Gilbert standing over me with my phone in his hand.

"Wha- the-" I mumbled, however I soon heard an irritating noise coming from my phone. I laid quietly listening to the noise trying to remember something when I quickly realized that it was my alarm. I instantly sat up grabbing the phone from Gilbert. It was my alarm for school and even though I heard it I was still going to be extremely late. I was baffled how could I be late this bad, time said that it was almost noon. "Aw fuck me!" I exclaimed as I jumped out of bed. "How did this happen?"

"Snooze button," Gilbert replied. I quickly turned around to see him kneeling at the end of my bed. "You kept hitting the snooze button, but sometimes you would sleep through it, so I hit the snooze button. Eventually I got tired of hearing it and just woke you up."

I stood there staring at him, completely stunned. Which I was more stunned about I couldn't tell, was it the fact that I managed to do something so recklessly or the fact that Gilbert was suddenly the chatter box. I took a deep breath and turned away, brushing my hair out of my face.

"Can we stay home today?" Gilbert asked suddenly.

"What?" I questioned turning back to him, I watched as he stood up standing on the end of the bed frame.

"I don't wanna go to daycare, it's boring," Gilbert stated.

"Boring, it's not like you're in school, it's freaking daycare, how can daycare be boring?" I commented.

"It just is," Gilbert whined.

I gave out a loud sigh, "fine, I'm already extremely late, and I'm not really in the mood to drive all the way out there." I guess thinking about it now I made up all of those excuses to make myself feel better about making such a dumb decision. Gilbert gave out a loud cheer almost falling off the bed in the process. I quickly leaned forward picking Gilbert up off the bed. "We may be staying home, but we are going to go out and get stuff done."

"I think you're missing the point of staying home," Gilbert commented.

"You skipped school today?" Jazmin asked over the phone sometime later in the day, in a tone that was just short of calling my an idiot.

"Yeah, I mean I was already late and Gilbert wanted to stay home," I replied. Soon enough I heard Jazmin arguing as Cass took over her phone.

"Rachel do not tell me you are catering to that boy!" Cass exclaimed, I had to pull the phone away from my ear from how loud she shouted.

"No," I denied, "I'm not catering him, I just been thinking-"

"No, you're definitely coddling him, you always do!" Cass interrupted.

"No I don't, I know how to care for a child!" I exclaimed, I didn't even notice that I got louder, but Gilbert did cause he walked into the room with a confused expression. "God damn it!" I shouted as I slammed my phone on the table.

"What's wrong?" Gilbert asked. I flinched and quickly turned, him talking regularly still jars me.

"People are being a pain in an ass," I replied.

"Ass?" Gilbert repeated.

"Don't say that word, actually don't repeat a lot of the words I say," I quickly lectured. Gilbert didn't say another word he didn't even nod he just left as if what I said upset him somehow. I gave out a low sigh as I sat down at the table, I didn't want to admit it even though I was thinking it I refused to ever verbally let them know that they were absolutely right. But hell, pride is quite the bitch isn't it.

A/N:

I realize something a couple chapters ago, I'm writing this like somebody is telling a story however I highly doubt I will be able to tie it back to the scene in the beginning of the story. Well I guess this stuff happens when you make it up as you go.

Anyway as I said last time I'm hoping to wrap this up soon, not that I hate it or something, it's just that I have the ending planned and would love to have another finished story.

As always all comments, reviews and any statements your little heart desires are appreciated for feedback and support.

Until Next Time!

~Silent Fangirl


	13. If Only I Knew

Chapter 13 - If Only I Knew

"Chirp chirp," Gilbert mumbled as he sat at the kitchen table while I cooked, "chirp chirp chirp!"

I paused listening to him repeat the noise a couple more times before finally turning around, "Gilbert, what are you doing?"

"Chirp chirp," he repeated holding up a small, fuzzy, yellow plush bird that he had gotten for Easter last year. I was honestly surprised to see that he still had it. "Can we get a bird?" Gilbert asked.

"What?" I questioned.

"A bird, I want a real bird, can we get one?" He repeated.

"Uh, no," I shot down as I turned back around and began to cook again.

"Why not?" He asked.

"Because we can't afford one, and if we were going to get a pet, the last thing it would be is a bird," I explained.

"Why?" Gilbert shouted as he kicked the table. I immediately turned around pulling his chair away from the table.

"Stop," I sneered, "you are not throwing a fit, especially so early in the morning." His enraged expression quickly dropped as his eyes began to water. 'Shit,' I thought to myself as I stepped away from the chair. 'Is he having one of his moments, why, he hasn't had one in forever. Or maybe he's actually upset that I yelled at him. Then again I didn't really yell at him...' I quickly shook the thoughts out of my head. "If you're going to do this you can either sit here and calm down, or go into your room, cause I do not wanna hear it." He didn't even say another word, he just gave me this pis off expression before storming off.

"Preschool?" Jazmin asked as we talked over the phone later that day.

"Yeah, it was a pain in the ass but in the end it was worth it. He starts tomorrow," I explained.

"Tomorrow!" Jazmin exclaimed, "and you just now tell me!"

"Uh," I mumbled slowly.

"Did you seriously wait until the last minute to tell me?" Jazmin asked.

"Maybe," I mumbled. I waited in silence for Jazmin's long sigh to end.

"Ra-" she started before getting her phone snatched out of her hands once again.

"Preschool!" Cassidy exclaimed, I jumped at the sudden loud tone. "But he's only a baby!" I barley heard her over the screaming of Jazmin in the background. I slowly pulled the phone away from my ear and ended the call.

I took a long deep breath, "that was...something."

The next morning I gave out a loud groan and a shut off my alarm. I began to stretch my arms and legs in the hopes that it would wake me up. However what did wait me up was something kicking me in the legs. I gasped pulling my legs back and scrambling to turn on my lamp. Once the light was one and my vision was clear I pulled my covers back to see Gilbert sleeping at the end of my bed.

"Gilbert!" I exclaimed, "what the hell!" He only groaned as he swatted the air. "I thought you were over this," I mumbled as I got out of bed. "Come on, get up," I sighed as I picked up his face down body by his stomach. I carried his limp body to his room, grabbed the outfit I had pick out for him the night before then walked over to the bathroom. I set him down outside the down. He turned rubbing his eyes as I handed him the clothes. "Get dressed and hurry, I'll be downstairs making breakfast." He sighed as he clutched the clothes and dragged himself into the bathroom.

I softly gasped as my eyes shot open I looked in front of me to see the food in the toaster had finished. I must had began to daydream, which was strange I was still so tired when typically it doesn't take much in the morning to keep me awake. I turned when I heard footsteps walk in, Gilbert had already made his way to the table.

"Here," I stated, setting the plate of food on the table, "you eat while I go get ready." I then walked past him.

"Hey mom," he called turning in his chair. I flinched as I stopped walking, almost five years and yet ever time he said that word it made me flinch. "What's school like?"

I paused biting my lip, I could have easily said that it was a gateway into a hell full of stress and pressure. "Well it's preschool and I never went to preschool, but I'm sure it'll be fun." Gilbert didn't say another word he just gave me a 'huh okay' expression then turned and sat down.

"This is going to be a great experience I promise," I reassured fixing up his outfit as we stood outside the classroom.

"Where will you be?" He asked.

"I'll be at school too, but when I pick you up I'm taking you to aunt Jazmin and aunt Cass's house."

"Why?" He whined.

"Gil, I have to work right after school," I explained, "don't worry I'll pick you up at ten o'clock."

"Fine," he sighed, he pulled his backpack closer to his back then turned and walked into the classroom.

I slowly stood up shocked from that sudden change of expression. However I couldn't dwell on it for too long as I was already extremely late for class.

I gave out a long yawn as I walked into Jazmin's house. I walked into the living room to see Gilbert sitting in front of the T.V.

"Rachel, you're here," Jazmin stated as she walked in from the kitchen. "I just put dinner away but do you want some?"

"Uh, no, it's late and I'm extremely tired," I muttered. "Gilbert lets g-" I choked on my last word as I felt him quickly run and up and hug me. "Uh well, Jazmin thanks for watching him for me."

"No problem, I'm a lot cheaper then a daycare," Jazmin stated.

I chuckled, "heh, tell me about it."

The next morning I was even more out of it as Gilbert and I quietly sat at the table eating breakfast.

"Mom?" He called causing me to choke on my food.

"Mm, yes?" I replied as I properly swallowed my food.

"Do you know what Prussia is?" He asked.

"Russia?" I questioned thinking I misheard him.

"No Prussia," he corrected.

"Uh, no never heard of it," I replied.

"What about Austria or Hungary?" He asked.

"Uh Austria not really, and Hungary that a country in Europe I think," I answered.

"What about Germany?" He asked.

"Oh yeah defiantly, that's a European country," I stated, "why? What's with all of these geography questions?"

"Don't really know," Gilbert shrugged, "just something that's been in the back of my mind lately."

"Okay," I said slowly, "well finish up we're leaving soon." Gilbert nodded, I sighed leaning back in my chair watching him finish up his breakfast. Why would he be concern over some countries? Maybe he was smarter then I presumed, or maybe it was something else.

A/N:  
Okay so fun little fact, before I started watching Hetalia I didn't know many countries existed. So countries like Austria and Prussia I had no idea about.  
There was another thing I wanted to mention but I'm probably going to remember it after I upload this.  
Anyway, thanks for reading, all comments, and reviews are highly appreciated.  
Until next time!

~Silent Fangirl


	14. Answer me, please!

Chapter 14 - Answer me, please!

There were moments in my hectic life when I actually could stop and breath, but they were far and few in between. However what's bad about that is when I actually jump back into a day full of work and school, it's so much more stressful. Yet, that wasn't today, today I was home alone while Gilbert was at school, and what do on my day off, house work of course.

I was walking down the upstairs hallway, humming as I carried a laundry basket full of clothes. I stopped by Gilbert's bedroom door, setting the basket down I opened the door slightly, picked the basket back up and pushed the door opened further as I walked in. I only walked in a couple of steps before I finally stopped getting a good look around me. I slowly kneeled down setting the basket down, then walked to left wall, I gradually looked around to see no only this but all of the walls were plastered with the same drawing, of black bird in a crown. It drawn on tons of paper, scattered all over the walls.

"Oh my god," I mumbled as I ran my figures through over scalp, "my child is going nuts."

"Mom?" A voice called, I quickly turned to see Gilbert standing in the doorway.

"Gilbert!" I exclaimed, "I- I didn't even hear the bus, wait they let you walk in without seeing if I was home, seriously!"

"You okay?" Gilbert asked, catching me off guard.

I quickly looked around at the multiple drawings, "are you?" Gilbert didn't reply as we stared at each other in a tense, long silence. "For- forget it!" I stammered as I threw my hands up to my head. I hastily knelt down grabbing the basket and rushing out of the room.

"Mom?" Gilbert questioned turning to me.

"I've just- I've just gotta go, and m-make dinner," I stuttered without even turned to him as I ran down the stairs. I quickly placed the basket on a table and walked into the kitchen.

This kid was four almost five and he was asking if I was alright, normal four year olds don't worry about that kind of crap. Then again he always far from normal. He didn't speak like a child, he really didn't even think like a small child. He always seemed way more intelligent then his age would make you assume. He was something I've never experienced before, and I've spent my whole life caring for kids and yet Gilbert, he's definitely something I've never seen before. Then again, I don't what to expect from a child that I found in the woods of a north east American state.

"Mom?" Gilbert called.

"What!" I exclaimed sharply turning, I quickly placed my hands on my face pulling them back over my head, brushing my hair back. "What?" I repeated calmly.

"I uh-" he started but stopped when my cellphone began to ring.

"Hold on," I stated as I picked up my phone. "Hello?"

"Alright...okay...bye," I said after our conversation,then hung up and placed the phone down.

"I didn't do anything," he mumbled as he peered over the counter. He knew that it was the school.

"Gil, what's with those drawings?" I asked, according to the phone call, he's been drawing that bird on everything, which was just the icing on the cake they wanted to talk to me about.

Gilbert shrugged, "it's just something."

"What do you mean something?" I questioned.

"Just something," Gilbert mumbled.

"Gilbert, that school is concerned that something maybe be wrong, so can you help me clean up this mess a little bit," I pleaded.

"It's just something...that's been...on my mind," Gilbert said slowly.

"What do you mean on your mind, you're four!" I exclaimed.

"I don't know," he whined in a soft tone.

I exhaled softly, "me either. Well because I have to go to a conference I have to skip college tomorrow, that's going to put me behind."

"I'm sorry," he mumbled.

I gave a small smile as I reached around the counter, picking him up and landing him on my lap. "That's okay you can't help being a little weird, you can say you get it from me." Guess it made him feel better cause he began to laugh softly. I'm a natural.

"Can I ask something?" A secretary asked as she lead me the office of the school principal the next morning.

"Um sure," I replied.

"Gilbert, is he adopted?" She asked.

"Um, yeah," I answered.

"Oh good, cause when you walked in my first thought was, 'this can't be her, she looks nothing like him, and she looks way too young," she replied a bit too enthusiastic.

"Ah you must be Gilbert's mother," the principal stated as he walked out of his office, "please come in. You're honestly not what I expected." He stated as we sat down in his office.

"Yeah, I seem to be getting that a lot," I mumbled.

"Okay well you're probably a busy person so I'll make this quick," he said as pulled out a folder, "Gilbert has peaked our interest." He opened the folder and slid it across the desk towards me. "Have you ever seen these drawings?"

I pulled the folders towards me as I looked through the papers. "Uh, yes and no," I replied. I flipped through paper after paper each litters with not only the drawings of that black bird with the crown, but of some small black cross. "Can I take these with me?" I asked.

"Uh sure," he replied slowly. I quickly closed the folder and stood up from my chair. "Wait wait wait!" He exclaimed, "Gilbert seems to be highly advanced in certain subjects such as geography and especially history, can I know how you manage to teach a child something like that."

I quickly exhale jagged breaths through my compressed lips making a low mother sound, "hell if I know."

"Excuse me?" The principal questioned.

"I don't know honestly, he's always been like that," I stated.

"Was it something his birth parents did?" He asked.

I shrugged, "doubt it, I fou- ah adopted him as a baby."

"Well okay," he replied.

"So we good, can I like go?" I asked using my thumbs to point at the door.

"Yes of course," he replied. Well he didn't have to tell me twice I was out that door like the room was on fire.

I quickly slid into the driver seat of my car and threw the folder to the seat next to me. I exhaled as I slid my hand over my face and head pulling any lose hairs back. "What am I doing?" I asked myself, "this isn't at all how I imagined my life. I'm a hypocrite, my life is a mess, and it keeps getting worst." I tightly closed my eyes and opened them to see my reflection in a mirror. "Your whole life is a mess Rachel, stop bitching," I took a deep breath, I was talking to myself. I reached over and grabbed the folder, I flipped the papers a couple more time, I paused thumbing one of the papers. The top of the paper was his name always is, it said Gilbert but it looked like a completely different name was written then erased. I quickly pulled out a pencil then erased his name then began to shade the paper hoping to see the indent of the first name.

"P-R-U-S-S-I-," I paused setting the pencil down, "Prussia." I quickly threw the papers to the side and turned on the car, there somebody I had to go to, hopefully I'll start getting some answers.

A/N:

Alright so I'm fourteen chapters in and I still have no idea what I'm doing. However a lot of people have been thinking that I'm going add more countries. If this story ends the way I have planned that's not going to happen. However a certain review did give me a good idea, so bringing other nations could happen but don't get your hopes up.

Not much more to say, just thanks for reading, and don't forget to comment for feedback and support.

Thank you for reading.


	15. A Girl Can't Help It

Chapter 15 - A Girl Can't Help It

"Okay, Prussia," Cass mumbled as she slid her glasses up her nose. "Uh, okay according to wiki Prussia was a historic state originating out of the Duchy of Prussia and the Margraviate of Brandenburg, and centered on the region of Prussia."

"Uh," I replied slowly.

Cass sighed, "Prussia is just a German influenced country that isn't around anymore."

"It isn't?" I questioned.

"No it isn't, it dissolved in 1947," Cass then shut her laptop, "what's the meaning of this?"

"Honestly, it's Gilbert," I confessed.

"What?" Cass questioned, "how does this concern a four year old?"

"He's been acting strange," I mumbled.

"Define strange," Cass said as she leaned back in her chair.

"He's asked me history and geography questions that a kid shouldn't care about, he's been writing the word Prussia everywhere now, and he's been repetitively drawing this black bird in a crown, and a small black cross," I explained.

"Black bird in a crown?" Cass repeated.

"Yeah, he has drawings of it all over his room," I replied.

"Does it look like this?" Cass asked as she turned the laptop around.

I leaned over the table to see a picture of a of a flag with a detailed black bird in a crown in the center. "Is that-?"

"A Prussian flag, yes it is," Cass finished, she pulled the laptop back, typing some more until she stopped and turned it back to me. "As for the little black cross."

"An iron cross?" I questioned.

"It was normally a military decoration only, though there were instances of it being awarded to civilians for performing military functions," Cass explained reading the article.

"So this is just a but of german stuff?" I asked.

"Kinda ironic seeing how you're polish," Cass chuckled.

"Hilarious," I scoffed.

"Anyway I'm thinking that this strange activity could be the result of his birth parents' culture," Cass assumed.

"If that's the most normal reason, I'll take it," I agreed, "well thanks, but I've gotta head home, Gilbert's going to be home soon."

"Or I'm completely wrong and he's some magical creature from the forest," Cass joked as I walked out the door.

"His birth parents' culture," I mumbled as I walked to my car, "yeah, that excuse can keep me sane for a while."

"Rachel!" Jazmin called as her, Cass, and Gilbert walked into the house.

"Over here!" I shouted as I heard Gilbert run upstairs, "I'm in the living room." Jazmin and Cass walked into the room to see me kneeling in the center of the room. "Thanks again for picking up Gilbert while I finished a project. I'm actually finished it earlier then expected, I just didn't want Gilbert to get into my supplies. Actually I managed to get something else done." I reached over and quickly placed something on my head.

"Is that a flower crown?" Jazmin asked.

"Yes, you know I always wanted one," I replied, "oh and hold on to something cause it's about to get cute. Gilbert!" I called, within seconds I heard Gilbert run down stairs and into the room. "Sweetie come here," I gestured, he sprinted up to me, I then reached behind me and dropped a flower crown onto his head. "Look at my smol child," I cooed. The pure amazement in their eyes was great, they looked like they were about to have heart failure from cuteness. "Aw, my precious little cinnamon roll too pure for this world."

"What?" Gilbert asked.

"Smol, precious cinnamon roll," I repeated slowly. Gilbert didn't even respond, he just walked into a different room. "I feel so old now," I mumbled as I stood up.

"You have glitter all over your jeans," Jazmin pointed out.

"Well you know what they say," I said as I brushed my jeans off with my hands, "don't cry, craft." All I heard was two sets groans as I walked into the kitchen. I walked in to see Gilbert sitting at a table, the flower crown still on his head. "Come on Gilbert, let's take pictures together."

"She seems to be in a much better mood lately," Jazmin commented.

"My guess is that she found a reason for all of that weirdness and that's calmed her down," Cass explained.

"Reason?" Jazmin asked.

"We concluded that it was the result of his birth parents' culture," Cass replied.

"I don't know, that seems kinda of a stretch," Jazmin commented.

"If it keeps her happy I don't care what she believes," Cass stated.

I walked into the living room, Gilbert in one arm, the flower crowns in my other hand. "Did you need something?" I asked completely missing their conversation.

"Oh no we're good," Jazmin replied.

"Well we should head home," Cass stated turning to her girlfriend.

"Actually," Jazmin suddenly exclaimed, "Rachel I wanna talk to you privately."

"Uh, okay," I mumbled, I leaned over letting Gilbert down, "there you go, don't kill anything." He immediately ran out of my arms and upstairs. Before I could even properly stand back up Jazmin grabbed my arm and dragged me into a different room.

"What are you doing?" She demanded.

"What?" I asked.

"You have been missing so much school and work lately," Jazmin replied.

"No I haven't!" I exclaimed, "I went to school today."

"But not work, when was the last time you went to school and worked in the same day?" She asked.

"Oh so it's bad that I'm actually take time for myself!" I snapped.

"Rachel no, I'm happy that you aren't a stressed wreck, but both are important, and you're always neglecting one or the other," Jazmin replied calmly.

"So what, just drop out of college?" I asked.

"No, well it's your choice," Jazmin replied.

"I can't," I mumbled.

"Well you defiantly can't stop working," Jazmin stated.

"I know, I'll figure something out," I replied.

"You sure?" Jazmin asked, "I could always help-"

"No no," I exclaimed, "I can handle it."

"You sure?" She asked.

"Absolutely," I nodded.

"Well alright," Jazmin replied, "I'm sure Cass is getting impatient, so we're going to head home."

"Alright goodbye," I said as watched the two headed out the door. I exhaled a long sigh once the door was shut.

I should have said yes.

A/N:

The middle of this chapter is so dumb, but I thought of it while trying to take a nap, and I loved it all too much. Also, I managed to get this chapter done cause I had the idea for this rather quickly. So in order to help me produce chapters faster, I would love some ideas.

Anyway, as always all comments, reviews, and ideas are highly appreciated for support and feedback.

Thanks for reading and until next time!

~Silent Fangirl


	16. Cracked

Chapter 6-Cracked

"You did what!" Jazmin shouted causing me to pull the phone away from my ear.

"I uh, started online school," I repeated slowly.

"What happen to, 'oh I don't want to do online school, it doesn't work with my major,'?" Jazmin mocked.

"I know I said that but it just makes things so much easier," I stated.

"How?" Jazmin asked.

"Well, if I'm doing online I'm home more often, I can work more, and I can spend more time with Gilbert," I explained.

"You do know that online is more self taught, and you not really the kind person for that," Jazmin stated.

"I can handle it," I said, did I ever mention that my pride is a root to so many of my problems and mistakes.

"You can barely learn when the professional teaches, how are you going to teach yourself?"

"I'll be fine," I stated.

"Rachel-" Jazmin whined.

"Great talk, okay bye!" I exclaimed interrupting her then immediately hung up the phone. I slide the phone into my pocket and closed my laptop in front of me. I sighed as I leaned back and slouched down in my chair to only jump back up when I felt something brush against my legs. I quickly slide back my chair to see Gilbert sitting under my desk. "Gilbert, what the fuck," I mumbled.

"I'm sorry," he muttered.

"What?" I questioned, oh god what did he do?

"You're not going to college because of me," Gilbert said as he crawled out from under the desk.

"Yes I am," I replied.

"Then why was Aunt Jazzie yelling at you?" He asked.

"Aunt Jazzie yells at me a lot," I stated leaning back in my chair.

"Why?" He asked.

I sighed, he was at that staged were he questioned everything, "because I make a lot of dumb decisions."

"Like me," Gilbert stated, it wasn't even a question.

"What no!" I gasped, leaning down, "where did you get that idea?"

"I heard Aunt Cass and Jazzie talking and they said that your life would have been completely different if you never found me," Gilbert explained.

"Really?" I sneered, "well don't listen two those two."

"Why?" He asked.

I sighed standing up from my chair, "don't worry about it, now go play or something I'm going to start dinner."

"Alright," he said the stood up and ran upstairs.

"Unbelievable," I mumbled, "those two need to keep their nose out of my business."

The sound of my steps echoed through out the kitchen as I paced the room for the pasted half hour.

"Mom?" Gilbert called.

"Gilbert," I mumbled my voice muffed by the fingers on my lips. I quickly pulled my nails out from between my teeth. "Wh-what are you... I mean is-is something wrong?"

Gilbert remained silent staring at me with eyes that made me feel like a confused child.

Sadly this wasn't the first time I stared at that expression.

"Why can't I get this right!" I shouted as I threw my pen at my computer screen. I slowly rubbed my hands on my face as I took a deep breath. "Shut the fuck up Rachel," I mumbled. Gilbert hopefully has been at least in bed for a couple hours and how much I love for him to stay in there all night for once since we've moved here.

I placed my head on the palms as I stared at the computer screen. I scrunched up my face as I continually stared at my trashy excuse for art. Slowly I leaned back in my chair and began to rock back and forth. "I can do it." I mumbled, then leaned forward picked the pen back up and continued fixing my work.

I paused turning around as I heard creaking outside my door. "I swear to god he better not," I whispered before turning back to my screen. It seemed like my progress got slower and slower as the creaking became louder and louder. "He better not," I sneered taping my pen on my desk.

I froze as I heard my door slowly creak open. I set the pen down and turned my chair to face the door where Gilbert stood in the doorway his small smile slowly dropped as he saw my stern expression. I stood up and walked over to the door.

"Mom-" he started

"Back to bed," I commanded.

"But-"

"No!" I sneered, "I have work I need to get done for school, so whatever it is I DON'T CARE!" I wasn't even thinking when I slammed the door shut. Honestly all I could remember from that night was being in a stressed and pissed mood.

I hear it a lot that you shouldn't go to bed mad and it's rather true cause when my alarm went off the next morning I felt a mixture of guilt and wanting to murder something.

My mood began to calm down as our morning continued. He sat quietly at the table eating his breakfast as I leaned against the counter flipping through a book. Every once in a while I would look up from my book to see him. Eventually I noticed that he was also looking up periodically when we made eye contact and he quickly looked down. I closed the book causing Gilbert to jump.

I sighed, "come on you've got school." Gilbert didn't say a word as he walked out of the room. "He- he'll be fine, he's a kid." I mumbled.

I had a hour after I got out of work before I had to pick Gilbert up from school so I decided to work on a college project.

"Almost, almost, almost," I mumbled repetitively finishing up the project. The smile on my face grew bigger as I watched it come together. I paused dropping the pen along with the smile on my face. I slowly turned around as the creaking outside my door. Gradually I stood up and walked over to the door, I quickly threw it open. I held my breath I stared down the hallway, I was staring at nothing.

I exhaled as I brushed my hair back. "Oh I'm completely sane!" I sneered. Silence became the only sound as I realized that I was talking to myself.

I loudly shrieked as my cellphone alarm went off causing me to jumped. I turned around to see it was passed 3 o' clock.

"Ah fuck me!" I shouted as I quickly grabbed my phone an keys and ran out the door.

A/N:

Long time no see! Okay so this chapter was stalled for two reasons;

• I was having writers block

• I've been out of school for about a month now

Now I know a lot of you guys are thinking 'oh if you're out of school shouldn't you be able to write more . Well you see I mostly wrote in class to waste time and procrastinate. I'm a great student I know.

All comments, reviews, and feedback are all highly appreciated!

Thanks for reading!

Until next time!


	17. Awkward

Chapter 17 - Awkward

I am an awkward girl, living a life full of awkward situations. Let's just say that lately my life has jut been riddled with this moments. That car ride home, oh well that was pretty much the definition of awkward.

"Gilbert," I called as he quietly walked inside.

"I have school work," he sneered.

My jaw dropped as I felt sharp twist in my chest. "I want to talk to you."

"I don't care!" he snapped.

"Gilbert," my voice cracked. I kneeled over and began to rub my eyes and face. I'm a grown adult, what the hell. I took a step back as I heard footsteps go up the stairs. I slowly dragged my body down the wall trying to choke back my childish outbursts. I took a deep breath, brushing my hair back. I rested my head on my crossed arms on my knees.

"Mom," his small voice called. I gasped lifting my head up, seeing Gilbert in front of me, his hands on my arms. "Will you be honest?"

"W-what?" I stammered shifting so I now sat on my legs.

"Am I ruining your life?" He asked.

"Oh sweet Jesus," I mumbled rubbing my eyes and face. "Gilbert, first of all, you're five years old and the fact that your asking me this worries me." I hesitated thinking, I slowly shifted so I was now kneeling. "You will never ruin my life. You will never be a mistake, and you will never have anything to do with anything bad in my life."

"But last night," Gilbert mumbled.

"Putting it simply, life isn't always going be great, but it isn't always going to suck," I explained.

"What?" Gilbert mumbled.

"Listen you're young, and I don't want to get into too many detail, besides if I do I might have an existential crisis," I stated.

"What?" Gilbert repeated slowly.

My tired eyes slowly opened as I heard a voice above me.

"Rachel!" The voice shouted.

In a state of panic I quickly snapped open my eyes. I exhaled when my vision finally cleared and I saw Jazmin standing over me.

"You gave me a heart attack," I mumbled as I sat up.

"What are you doing sleeping at this time of the day?" Jazmin asked.

"It's called a nap," I replied.

Jazmin scoffed as she rolled her eyes, "what happen to not letting Gilbert sleep in your bed anymore?"

"It's been a long day, what do you want?" I mumbled.

"What I can't visit my best friend?" Jazmin sneered.

"Hi Aunt Jaz," Gilbert greeted in a sleepy voice .

"Hello sweet heart," Jazmin replied them turned to me with a stern expression. "We need to talk."

"I can't believe you and Cass broke up," I stated a I set a mug of cold tea in front of her.

"Yeah she's currently moving out," Jazmin replied looking down at her drink.

"Mom!" Gilbert shouted as he ran into the kitchen. He stopped in front of me holding up a piece of paper. He quickly handed off to me then ran off.

"Parent Teacher Conference," I mumbled, "TOMORROW! GILBERT WHY DIDNT SHOW THIS TO ME EARLIER!" I shouted, I took a deep breath setting the paper on the counter. "Deal with that later," I stated as I sat down at the table.

"Cass is just so...ug," Jazmin mumbled, just by her expression I knew that what she had to say wasn't positive.

"Wonder how I'm going to explain this to Gilbert," I stated trying to change to subject. "Well I guess it shouldn't be that hard he's -"

"What's it matter?" Jazmin inturrupted.

"I'm sorry, what?" I asked.

"I mean he's not going to see her again so-" she explained.

"What!" I questioned, "why not?"

"Why should she?" Jazmin exclaimed, "she left us!"

"She left you," I sneered, holding back my desire to shout.

"She-" Jazmin argued before she got cut off.

"No!" I snapped, "Cass has been in Gilbert's life since he was a baby, if she wishes to see him who am I to stop her."

"A good friend!" Jazmin shouted.

"I am a mother too!" I exclaimed slamming my hands on the table, "and I've gotta put him first especially when it comes to bullshit like that!"

"Whatever," Jazmin sneered standing up, "I don't give a fuck!" She then storm out of the room and the house.

I slowly picked up the mug I was drinking out of and dumped the rest of it in the sink then placed the mug in the sink.

"What did you do this time?" Gilbert asked as he walked into the room.

"What!" I exclaimed turning around.

"Well, you and Aunt Jaz were shouting and you said that she shouts when you make dumb decisions," Gilbert explained.

I sighed, "well believe it or not I'm not the one making dumb decisions this time."

"Then what happen?" Gilbert asked.

I took a deep breath as I walked over to Gilbert, kneeling down, "sweetie, Aunt Jaz and Aunt Cass aren't together anymore."

"What happen?" He asked.

"They uh... just don't love each other anymore," I shrugged. How exactly do I explain this, I know he can be smart but would he understand it?

"Oh," Gilbert mumbled, he turned his head down, remaining quiet for a while. I slowly stood up, looking down at him. Finally his head shot up staring fearfully at me. "Will you ever do that to me?" He exclaimed.

"What?" I questioned.

"Will you ever stop loving me?" He asked.

"What, no!" I exclaimed.

"Are you sure," he mumbled his head dropping back down.

"Yes!" I stated dropping to my knees, I placed both my hands oh his cheeks turning his head up so he was looking at me. "I will never stop loving you because you are my s-, I am your m-," I paused holding my breath," I love you." I finally said, then stood up.

"WHY WON'T YOU SAY IT!" Gilbert screamed scaring me.

"What!" I exclaimed.

"Why won't you say that I'm your son or your my mom!" He shouted.

"W-wha," I stammered. "Why can't you be a normal kid!" I shouted. "Normal kids your age don't ask questions, much less even think about it. Five year old boys are loud and destructive." I quickly bit my tongue realizing what I said.

The two of use stared each other down before he ran over to the table picked up the mug on the table and threw it on the floor, shattering it. My jaw dropped as I stared at the glass shards. Gilbert quickly looked up at me then ran out of the room.

"What is my life," I mumbled.

A/N:

Well I actually had this chaptered planned so I started writing this rather quickly. Well I only went with half of my chapter plan but I do have ideas for the next chapter.

Anyway thanks for reading and all comments, reviews, and feedback are all highly appreciated.

Until Next Time!

~Silent Fangirl


	18. Thoughts

Chapter 18 - Thoughts

"I'm home!" I announced as I walked through the front door.

"Hey," Jazmin greeted as she walked into the room. Believe or not even with our little dispute yesterday she was still more willing to help babysit Gilbert while I went to the parent teacher conference.

"Where is he?" I asked as the two of us walked into the kitchen.

"Upstairs," Jazmin replied, "he's been there all day. Every time I knock on his door he doesn't reply but I think I heard mumbling."

"Yeah," I mumbled as I set a couple of bags on the counter, "of course."

"What's in the bags?" Jazmin asked.

"Between work, school, and that damn conference I'm to lazy to cook, so I just picked up some take out. It's from his favorite place, I imagined it would cheer him up." I explained.

Jazmin sighed, "how was the conference?"

"Just full of multiple people saying things like, 'oh your his mom, you're so young, you look nothing like him.' So pretty much before I could even explain everybody just assumed that I was some teen whore who banged an albino and was left with the aftermath!" I exclaimed.

"You okay?" Jazmin asked, "you seem really on edge and stressed."

"Honesty, no," I replied rubbing my face.

"Hey I know I said it before but I'm really sorry," Jazmin apologized. "I was over reacting and-"

"It's not that," I inturrupted. "It's just, I can't get a break."

"I'm going to assume that you two are still on bad terms," Jazmin commented.

"I thought he would get over it by now," I stated, "but hey what do I know, clearly not the child I decided to raise!"

"He's a child Rachel," Jazmin stated.

"He's," I paused, "he's not normal." I said in a hush tone. "Haven't you noticed?"

Jazmin paused, "Rachel are you regretting-"

"No!" I quickly answered. "No, it's just, it's getting to be too much. Sometimes I just wonder what would happen if I just passed him off to somebody better prepared. I mean I've babysat, helped care for kids all my life, but this is something else."

"Rachel," Jazmin paused, "I'm not a parent, but I agree you shouldn't be a parent at this age. However I can understand the stress, but unless you're willing to, as you said, 'pass him off to somebody more prepared' or you can hold onto your pride and keep going."

"What are you saying?" I asked.

"That you can bitch and complain all you want, but when it comes down to it, you're an adult Rachel, you need to make your own decisions," Jazmin stated.

"I did, and I wasn't even an adult," I mumbled.

"I know," Jazmin replied, "but you are now." She paused looking at her phone, "listen I've gotta go, call me if you need anything."

"Yeah," I acknowledged, "thanks for babysitting by the way."

"Gilbert," I called as I knocked on his bedroom door. "I got take out, it's your favorite." No replied, I slowly leaned my head against the door, Jazmin was right I could hear mumbling.

"...brother..." He mumbled.

I gradually opened the door to see him pacing his room. "Gilbert," I called.

Gilbert abruptly stopped turning to me, "mom! You're home."

"Yeah and I got dinner, why don't you come down before it gets cold," I replied. Gilbert only nodded then quickly ran past me and down the stairs. I turned as I watched him run into the kitchen. "Brother?" I mumbled before walking down the stairs.

"Hey mom?" Gilbert called as the two of us sat the table eating.

"Hmm?" I mumbled quickly swallowing my food.

"Do you have a brother?" He asked.

"Uh yeah," I replied, "just one."

"Younger or older?" He questioned.

"He's the youngest of all of my sibling," I answered.

"Do you get along with him?" He asked.

"Yeah, I guess," I replied, "what's with the questioned?" Gilbert only shrugged.

The constant tapping echoed my work room as I tapped my foot against the wall. After dinner the house became quiet as Gilbert sat in the living watching tv as I sat up in my work room working on school work.

"Mom?" Gilbert called as he slowly opened the door.

"What's up sweetie?" I asked.

"What are doing?" He asked.

"Just working on something for school," I replied.

"Oh," he mumbled, I watched as he slowly backed away from the door.

"Come here sweetie," I called holding my arms out. Gilbert ran up to me, I grabbed him and placed him on my lap.

"What is this?" Gilbert asked staring at the computer screen.

"Well it's just a comic for class," I answered.

"What a weird class," Gilbert commented.

"I know," I paused, "you know what idea I love the most?"

"What?" Gilbert asked.

"Personification," I replied, I didn't even notice Gilbert shocked expression as he looked between me and the computer. "The idea of taking ideas and things, and giving them an image and a personality, I love it."

"Anything?" Gilbert mumbled.

"Yeah," I replied, "days of the week, seasons, elements-"

"Countries?" Gilbert interrupted.

I remained quiet mulling it over, "uh yeah, I guess that would work." Before I could even react Gilbert jumped off my lap and ran out of the room. "Gilbert hey!" I shouted. "What did I say?" I mumbled.

"Shit Rachel," Jazmin chuckled as the two of us sat in my kitchen the next day, "you are just so good at offending people."

"Pis off," I sneered.

"You worried?" Jazmin asked.

I shrugged, "nah."

"Really?" Jazmin questioned.

"Really," I nodded, "I could spend my whole life worrying about him, but you no what, pis on it! That child can be as weird and abnormal as he wants. If he's happy who gives a flying fuck!"

Jazmin chuckled, "you go girl, glad you finally made some decisions. To think it only took you almost six years."

"I go back to my previous statement, pis off," I stated.

Jazmin snickered, "oh by the way, what are the plans for Gilbert's sixth birthday?"

My jaw dropped and I froze as thought finally registered in my mind. "Ah fuck!"

A/N:

And my rain my rapid updates are over. They should get slower unless I get some ideas for chapters. This will give me sometime time to update other stories.

As always all thanks for reading and all comments, reviews, and feedback are all highly appreciated.

Until next time!


	19. Paranoia

Chapter 19 - Paranoia

*four years later*

"Hey mom!" Gilbert called as he walked into the kitchen. I paused cleaning up from the small celebration we had between Gilbert, Jazmin, and I for Gilbert's tenth birthday.

"What?" I responded.

"How old do I have to be 'til I can get a pet bird?" Gilbert asked.

"When you're old enough to move out, then you can have one," I answered.

"What age is that?" Gilbert asked.

"When you move out," I replied, "thought that was self explanatory." Gilbert scrunched his face and walked out the kitchen. I chuckled to myself, he's not mad, it's just an act.

I paused when I heard my cellphone ring, I quickly picked up my phone to only see it was an unknown number, I hesitated, as a teen or even young adult I rarely picked up unknown numbers basically cause it was mostly prerecorded messages from fake companies or dumb prank calls. I sighed, I'm an adult, well age wise, I had to pick it up.

"Hello?" I mumbled.

Nobody replied, but there was definitely somebody on the other side, maybe multiple people I could here a hush conversation. I couldn't tell, how many people, how old they were, anything I was lucky enough to even hear the whispering.

"Ah for fuck sake!" I sneered as I hung up.

"Bombs away!" I exclaimed dropping Gilbert on his bed we both laughed as I kneeled down at the side of his bed. I threw the blanket over him smiling as he quickly pulled the blanket off of his head. The sudden moments of the blanket caused some papers on the bed side table fly off.

My attention changed as I picked up the papers off of the floor. It was the same drawing I've seen for years now, the drawing with black thick borders at the left and right side of the paper and a large yellow bird in the middle.

"Mom!" Gilbert shouted.

I gasped dropping the papers, "what?"

"What's wrong?" Gilbert asked.

I scattered to picked up the papers, "why do you keep drawing this?" I asked, Gilbert only shrugged. I stood up holding the papers neatly in my arms. "Can I borrow these?"

"Why?" Gilbert asked.

I shrugged, "because."

"Um okay," he mumbled as he laid down in his bed.

"Good night," I said.

"Night," he replied.

"I know I've seen it before," I mumbled flipping though the papers once more.

It's been quiet a few years since I've done research on Gilbert's strange behavior. Most people who have kids with strange behavior probably asked for professional help, but well... remember when I said that I'm very prideful and that it gets in my way a lot, well that.

I paused remembering that Cassidy, who was now Max did research for me on my laptop. 'That was years ago,' I thought to myself leaning back in my chair. "Unless," I mumbled out loud sitting up, "did she save any of the sites?" I held my breath as I slowly scrolled through my saved pages. I paused then quickly opened a page saved years ago. When it finally loaded up. I was right she did save it, a whole website for me. "Yes!" I exclaimed "god bless that g- boy."

"Why are you talking to your self?" A voice asked. I quickly turned almost knocking my laptop off my desk.

"Jazmin!" I sneered.

"Jeez a little louder, I don't think you woke him up yet," she teased.

"How did you get in?" I asked.

"I know where you keep your spare key," she replied pulling up a chair and sitting down next to my desk.

"For fucks sake," I mumbled sitting down.

"What happen to swearing less?" Jazmin asked.

"What happen to knocking?" I sneered.

"Okay you're obviously in a bad mood," Jazmin stated.

"Really?" I replied sarcastically, "I couldn't tell."

"What's wrong?" Jazmin asked.

"Oh nothing," I answered, "I was in a fine mood before I thought a killer got into house."

"Jeez," Jazmin mumbled then glanced over to my desk to see drawings scattered all over, "what are you doing?"

"Gilbert has been drawing the same picture for years now," I explained.

"Oh yeah," Jazmin commented, "he's gotten better, maybe he could be better then you." Jazmin laughed until she noticed my glare.

"Anyway," I continued, "I just wanted to know if it had something to do with-"

"You do realize that Prussia isn't a country anymore," Jazmin interrupted.

"Huh?" I mumbled barley paying attention to her. "Oh yeah, I've known that for a while now."

"Sure," Jazmin replied, "anyway why do you have the wiki page about it up? You doing a report on it or something?"

Without even turning away from the screen I picked up the multiple drawing sitting on my desk passing it to Jazmin.

"I just saw th-"

"I knew it," I muttered interrupting her.

"Knew what?" Jazmin asked.

Finally turning to Jazmin I pointed to the screen. "His drawings are the same as this country's flag."

"That's uh, random," Jazmin mumbled. "Why would he know anything about a country that hasn't been around for decades?"

"I don't know," I replied.

"Rachel," Jazmin softly called catching my attention, "we've done this before."

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"This paranoid research," Jazmin asked. "You notice something strange about him and you run to the internet like a hypochondria with a headache."

"That's-" I paused, "quite a metaphor."

"Rachel you said that you would stop being so paranoid about him. He's fine, so he's a little strange, like how he didn't act like a baby at all, or knew fluent german, or how-" Jazmin paused noticing my worried expression, "I'm not helping am I?" I only slowly shook my head.

Jazmin opened her mouth to speak again but stopped when she heard my cellphone ring. We both turned to the phone at the edge of my desk.

"Are you going to answer that?" Jazmin asked.

I turned to her then back to the cellphone before finally picking it up. "Hello?" I mumbled.

Jazmin remain quiet until she watch my expression change, my eyes widen as I held my breath. "Rach-"

"NO STOP!" I shouted before quickly dropping the phone.

A/N:

Well it only took 5-6 month but I finally finished a chapter to one of my stories. I thought school would motivate me to write again. Guess not.

I'm going to try to write more often but don't get you hopes up too much.

However I decided to help you guys know what's going on between chapter I'm going to start posting updates between chapters on my tumblr: sadistic-fangirl666

blog/sadistic-fangirl666

I'll try to use it update you guys on my writing for my stories.

Anyway as always all comments and favorites/follows are highly appreciated for support and feed back.

Thanks for reading!


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